~ Catatan Hidup Ku ~

Sedih siot.....

aku mmg tgh sedih sangat nie. tak tau nak kata camner. kepala aku buntu. fikiran aku celaru....hati aku resah....cam2 arrrr. kalu org tgh aku mmg la kuat. muka ganas....tapi perasaan aku sapa tau. aku pun manusia gak....ape kalu aku sedih. org ingat aku nie cam pompuan ke. anyway....aku rasa relationship aku ngan awek aku cam dah nak sampai ke penghujung nyer arrr. nie yg buatkan hati aku sedih sesangat. aku tak tau camner nak menjernihkan suasana. mcm takde kuasa la. aku punj tak tau camner nak ckp or nak ceritakan. aku dah cuba sedaya upaya aku. aku sayang kat dia. mmg tak dinafikan aku ader rasa bosan, takde gembira, cam kosong pun ader or rasa cam dull aje. semenjak dua menjak nie. tapi aku cuba atasi. aku cuba ikut kehendak dia. but keadaan menjadi semakin buruk. semakin tak terkawal. dia kata aku ego.dia kata mendiamkan diri bukan jalan penyelesaian. tapi...hakikatnyer kenapa aku mendiamkan diri. bukan aku taknak speak up. tell her the whole thing. about her attitude yg aku tak berkenan. aku nak jaga perasaan dia. aku taknak dia kecewa or terasa. aku sabarkan aje. even kalu nak bercakap dlm phone or ber sms ke. aku aku cuba gunakan bahasa yg takkan menyentuh perasaan dia. but sebalik nye lak pada dia.

dia asyik ingat aku curang. aku ader pompuan lain dlm hidup aku selain dia. hakikat nyer mana ader. nak telepon org lain pun aku malas. inikan nak jumpa. sapa yg nakkan aku nie. bukan nyer hensem or tampan mana pun. bukan nyer kaya or berpelajaran sangat. ape yg aku ada. ape yag aku warisi or harta ape yg aku ada. takde ape. mmg tak dinafikan aku nie jenis melayan. tapi as a friend. takkan aku couple ngan dia, aku tinggalkan life aku sebelum nie. apa kata member aku, ape kata sedara or sepupu aku.

nak kata aku tak melayan dia ngan baik. aku selalu gak la jumpa dia. aku turun kl. aku call aku sms (walaupun tak sekerap dulu). member aku sendiri kata aku still ader show something or effort. but kenapa dia still tak nampak. ader aje rasa tak puas hati. kalu ikutkan hati nak aje aku turun kl selalu jumpa dia, call dia setiap hari, sms dia setiap masa or bagi present or card selalu. tapi sapa la aku nie. aku bukan kaya pun, banyak mana duit yg aku ada. kalu dia kata aku dah lama tak call or anto sms tak balas....aku rasa sedih gak. bukan taknak call or balas....tapi aku pun ade kehidupan aku sendiri. mlm tadi dia kata kat aku..."apa kata kalu kita end aje"...satu perkataan yg aku sendiri tak sanggup nak sebut. kelu aku dibuatnyer mlm tadi. tak senang tido aku.................

Final Distance
utada hikaru.

Ki ni naru noni kikenai
Oyogitsukarete kimi made mukuchi ni naru
Even though I worry about it, I can't ask
I'm tired of swimming, and
even you have become shy

Aetai noni ienai nami ni osarete
Mata
sukoshi tooku naru
I want to see you, but I never can, waves push us apart
Again, just a little more distance

Tokirenai you ni keep it going
baby
Onaji kimochi janai nara tell me
Muri wa shinai shuugi demo
Sukoshi nara shite mite mo ii yo
We can't dismiss this if we want to
keep it going baby
If you don't feel the same then tell me
Even if you
see only the slightest chance,
Then it's okay to try for the big celebration

I wanna be with you now
Futari de distance shijimete
Ima nara
maniau kara
We can start over
Hitotsu ni wa narenai
Itsu no hi ka
distance mo
Dakishimerareru you ni nareru yo
Yappari I wanna be with you
I want to be with you now
Believe in us together through the distance
Now is the time
We can start over
Because I don't want to be alone
One day, even the distance
Will embrace me, but I'll get used to it
Because after all, I wanna be with you

Hito koto de konna ni mo
kizutsuku kimi wa
Kodoku wo oshiete kureru
Can a single word hurt this
much?
Teach me loneliness and then come back to me

Mamorenai toki
keep on trying, baby
Yakusoku toori janai kedo trust me
Muri wa shinai
shuugi demo
Kimi to nara shite mite mo ii yo
You can't stop the time,
keep on trying baby
I can't promise but, trust me
Even if you see only
the slightest chance,
Then it's okay to try for the big celebration

I wanna be with you now
Futari de distance mitsumete
Ima nara
maniau kara
We can start over
Kotoba de tsutaetai
I wanna be with
you now
Sono uchi ni distance mo
Dakishimerareru you ni nareru yo
We
should stay together
Yappari I wanna be with you
I wanna be with you now
Fix your eyes on us in through the distance
Now is the time
We can
start over
Because I don't want to be alone
Say it in words
One day,
even the distance
Will embrace me, but I'll get used to it
Because after
all, I wanna be with you

I wanna be with you now
Coz I know this
can't be forever
We can start over, just you and me
I wanna be with you
now
Coz I know this can't be forever
We should stay together, just you
and me
I wanna be with you
I wanna be with you now
Coz I know this
can't be forever
We can start over, just you and me
I wanna be with you
now
Coz I know this can't be forever
We should stay together, just you
and me
I wanna be with you